I have no idea how to do this. Never have.

You’re given a room full of people and a sticker with your name on it, and you have to just launch yourself in there and, like, talk to people. Say: “Hi! I’m Tim. I’m groovy and you want a piece of me. You do. You just didn’t know that you do before I sauntered over and finger pistoled you a compelling wink. Yeah. ..By the way, I should tell you that this kind of groovy does NOT come cheap…”

Right. Of course I’m comfortable doing that.

Mark took me to a fairly convincingly organised-looking affair at Landmarc lastnight; film students and, er, film students, I think. No sign of movie producers weeping for need of a really creative musician to bring their well-funded, starry-casted, lavish, big screen production to life.

So I killed time and my embarrassed Out Of Placeness by being a table whore.

Thank goodness there were some people who’d brought tables of leaflets. I sauntered around the gallery chatting to a nice succession of people manning various tables of leaflets and finding out what they do. Interesting things, it turns out. Could have chatted with some of them for longer quite happily.

But I was that awful thing at events – a chatty useless punter. I was no good to any of them for business. And none of them needed a groovy electro-beat score for anything. So I tried not to keep them for too long, and instead of networking, we just chatted and swapped branded material. It was nice. It was pointless.

It was my kind of business.

This morning, getting up early to get the latest Team e-mailer in shape, I found an e-mail from one Guru Josh Project (Official). Asking to be friends on MySpace.

Now, I don’t know if you know much about Guru Josh, he of the Infinity tune that was a smack-rave hit in the early 90s and has been again over Christmas, 18 years later. I didn’t. I only knew that the sax riff on that record is quite nice and GJ obviously knows this because he repeats the b’sheesh out of it for five minutes. Fair play. This creative attitute made a life-long career for Vangelis.

So I click to the page and find his biog.

OMG. As young MySpacers might put it. Which he clearly isn’t.

I couldn’t tear myself away from his story.

He’s hustled and blagged and worked his way through so many mad tales and bank accounts, I had to keep reading. Fortunes made and given away repeatedly. Sometimes intentionally.

Read it, you’ll see what I mean. His straight-talking yarning reminds me of friends I’ve known who’ve lived on the street – which he kind of has, I suppose, working it. It’s fascinating, and it’s under About Guru Josh:

Wish I had a story like this. Though I suspect the loved ones around me are glad I’m a little more predictable…

This morning, however, the only person I really want to network with is one of my oldest chums and fellow musical explorers, Kev.

I’m turning off Skype for a couple hours, pausing the studio’s deadlines, to go have a nice chat with my mate. Doubt it’ll make either of us any money. It’ll just be great to see him.

That’s my kind of networking.

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